healing your inner child

Affirmations can be a way to re-parent or give ourselves love, acceptance, and understanding that our parents or caregivers did not provide. By repeating these to ourselves, we can take the focus off of the missing parts (what was out of our control) and come into focus on what we can provide ourselves now (what is in our control).

Speaking these affirmations to ourselves is a way to reclaim our power and agency.

• I am so glad you were born.

• You are a good person.

• I love who you are and am doing my best to always be on your side.

• You can come to me whenever you’re feeling hurt or bad.

• You do not have to be perfect to get my love and protection.

• All of your feelings are okay with me.

• I am always glad to see you.

• It is okay for you to be angry and I won’t let you hurt yourself or others when you are.

• You can make mistakes - they are your teachers.

• You can know what you need and ask for help. You can have your own preferences and tastes.

• You are a delight to my eyes.

• You can choose your own values.

• You can pick your own friends, and you don’t have to like everyone.

• You can sometimes feel confused and ambivalent, and not know all the answers.

• I am very proud of you.

At the beginning of this practice, you may not believe these words and you might even laugh with doubt or feel weird speaking them. It takes time to heal the messages we learned when we were kids. It's also important to be ok with small steps of progress because those are the ones that have a lasting presence and tend to really "stick".

With patience and practice, these affirmations will become integrated into your mind, body, and spirit. Healing is a lifelong journey.

(Affirmations adapted from Pete Walker’s book “Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving”)